Saturday, November 9, 2019

HOBBIES FOR OLD FARTS

I've been searching for a good hobby to keep my hands and mind occupied. It used to be that old farts would play checkers, collect pennies or stamps, play a harmonica or other such activities. Of these hobbies I find one of them to be the most humorous.

Collecting pennies? How ridiculous.

As none of those mentioned holds any particular appeal to me, I've been actively seeking other ways to occupy (spelled W-A-S-T-E) my time. I was at a dead end until last week when I read that there's a local group of model airplane flyers close to where I live. They even have their own airstrip. Thinking about this, I remembered fondly how when I was a young boy I would beg my father to take me to where model airplane enthusiasts would fly their creations every Sunday. On occasion, he would drop his Sunday Boston Globe and take me to the model airfield where we would hobnob among the "pilots" (that's what they called themselves). To a young kid, these guys were the real deal, dressed in airplane-appropriate clothing, having huge aviator watches, and wearing those ultra-cool sunglasses with green lenses. Yep, to me, these guys were "the high and the mighty". I loved how they talked to each other with sweeping hand gestures, describing the last flight of their model crafts. Even as a young boy I ascertained that the pilots' conversations were highly exaggerated but were nonetheless exciting to my young ears. 

Thus, with a newfound youthful enthusiasm I dug into every bit of online information that I could find about radio-controlled (RC) airplanes. I was amazed at how much information was available. 

In analyzing and synthesizing this veritable warehouse of data, I learned one thing - these model planes crash...a lot. Each and every pilot related horror stories about how many planes they have crashed over the years. Interestingly, most of the pilots take it in stride, the thought being "I'll just buy a bigger faster plane". (NOTE: One which they likely will subsequently crash.)

So, armed with this information, I did some math. First: Each flight of a model plane lasts about 10 minutes. Let's exaggerate that time and say 20 minutes (or about 8.5 hours per 6 months). Next: Pilots who fly weekly will crash a plane every six months (my SWAG estimate). Thirdly: A fairly good plane and setup will run you about $500. So, if we ignore all other factors (gasoline, jewelry, dinner, wine and dancing for neglected wife, etc.) we come up with $500/8.5 hours or about $59/hour. 

For a guy as cheap as I am that's a pretty expensive hobby.

Accordingly, I've changed my mind and have decided to collect pennies.

Pinching the ones that I collect will be a bonus.

Readers, enjoy your day.